Baby moon and Baby Blues
And so at the time my frustrations are over riding my good sense of joy. Will I ever be the same person after having the baby or will it get worst? yes! less than four months to go and can't wait, then on the other hand I'm scared of something that I really can't figure out what. Oh well is babymoon similar to honeymoon except that you're trying to spend quality time with your partner before having the baby. And yes baby blues are here and still invading my sense of being, is that even possible? So yes, my happiness are turned to frustrations and oh! I'm learning to cope with the weirdness of my pregnancy blues. People would hold my bump as if they haven't seen one, and yes I am FAT! I get these manic statements such as Oh! you are so little I didn't know you are pregnant and that shirt suits you, don't you have any loose ones? Or some rough statements such as you are ugly and FAT! I mean I didn't ask for your opinions and yet you are giving yours. It isn't welcoming at all. Anyway, So I am going to be an aunt few months after having my own little angel. Why so soon?! Pregnancy has lots of emotional and physical strains. Will I ever recuperate? Will I ever trust my instincts, I'm pretty much confused at the moment, because of the happiness, me having a baby in few months time and becoming an aunt. So I need to keep up with my momentary illusions of Jenson Button or Bradley Cooper, oh my gosh it always makes my blues away.:) What exactly happens when the feeling of excitement is mask by frustrations and never ending mood swings? I started noticing that I was far more impatient and irritable than usual and that I just didn’t feel like my usual self. These feelings seemed above and beyond the typical changes that happens during pregnancy. I am struggling to keep up with my hobbies, all I want is to eat and sleep, those usual hobbies are very difficult at these stage. Sometimes I even feel my self withdrawing from friends and much more to my other half. And then it came to the point that I like doing things alone, which isn't really me at all, Before the pregnancy i used to enjoy long walks and spend time with GJ, yet now it's becoming more and more difficult, I am struggling with certain tasks, I am becoming slower and slower each passing day. I am pretty much about things, how's the baby doing, how am i going to tame myself or prevent myself from being horrible, normally I am an easy going person and now I am one of the strangest creatures God made, I am becoming a loner and pretty much depressed because of anxiety. I used to get up in the morning, smiling, and excited for the days work, and now getting up is a struggle and before I even start the day i feel discouraged on how the day will be. At some point I needed help, at least an emotional support from a loved one, yet where is the support, except from GJ. I don't want to use the term depression as it affects my psychological state of mind but the more i get worn out at work the more I feel down.
I guess I need to divert my attention from something that makes me happy such as:
Dancing
Singing (even if you can't sing, you still can sing your heart out)
Catching up with friends, which may be difficult but will be off help
Be cheerful at work, embrace life as it is.
Eat, cook and sleep as much as you want
Be grumpy whenever then laugh out loud as much as possible.
Blog 'em up (write and share your insights)
And lastly you need to build up a support system from loved ones (i.e partner), friends and colleagues. Professional help will boost your confidence, especially you feel appease that support is just round the corner :)